Monday, January 19, 2015

A New Hopeful Year

Not sure of the best place to begin after four months away from writing here. Beginnings are always the most challenging part of any writing piece for me. So many possible directions to take or excuses to make about why I haven't written.  I could also just jump right in, like so ..


It just feels like the right time to be back. To begin. Again.

Hopefully, I'll be getting some technical help in the not-too-distant future so this blog-o-mine can shift to WordPress and get some spiffy updates.  I realized awhile ago that I've been using that lack of techno-savvy as an excuse for not writing. Also? I've been playing around on Instagram much to my great satisfaction and delight.  No DSLR camera though until the new laptop's paid off. Yep. I'm full of reasons for not writing. No technical skill. No  camera. No time. No energy. No voice. No purpose .. what's this blog  supposed to be ABOUT anyway?

No. More. Excuses.

I write in my head all the time, so might as well make the time and just empty it all out.  Maybe I'll write about school one day and a really good granola recipe the next.  I might share a new book I've read or some ideas about spreading hope in this world of ours. It makes sense to me to share the bits and pieces of my life and the hope I find along the way. Being hopeful is sorta synonymous with new beginnings .. so here's mine. And you'll wait me out with the Iphone pics, right?

So, like some thousands of folks world-wide, I've been thinking about declaring a Word of the Year since the big ball dropped introducing 2015. And I've decided I really can't commit. Since each day has its own flavor, and my thoughts, moods, needs, and feelings shift around a bit, it makes more sense to work around a word of the day - or so. Lo and behold ... believe it or not ...  today's word was WRITE.  No time like NOW to get started then. I don't like breaking promises to myself.

I need a writing focus in my life. I need to explore writing from an artistic and communicative point of view, but I also need to write to learn. Writing is a work out. I write to learn about my relationships, spirituality, and thought patterns - both positive and destructive. I write to know me.

A Letter from Mom is a new series of letters I'm writing weekly to my children. They're love letters, really. Maybe someday they'll be important to them. Maybe someday they'll hold onto my words to remember my voice.  I wonder if I should record them somehow as an audio file? I don't need them to write back, I need them to know me. I weep to think I won't always be with them. I weep to know I'm beginning a a life independent from them just as they are beginning one independent of me. As they should. It's been a tough time for me. And I weep. Tears sometimes seep right out of me. Still, there's always hope - even in tears. Hope for a new kind of relationship with my grown children. Hope for a new life direction beginning for me.

There are bright spots in the hope of any beginning. I am at my most hopeful when I look for it. This little blog gives me an opportunity to find that hope and share it with all of you. I'll keep looking for those bright moments in each day's beginning, look for new words to think about and write about. And I know I'll find some hope in the bluest skies painted here and there - even in the middle of winter.

Hope is where you find it.

Peace ~ Barbara

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